How Spirituality and Spiritual Growth Affects Differences Between Men and Women
Gender differences between men and women are unique. This effects spirituality and spiritual growth like you can't imagine. A best selling book describes these differences: "Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus."
As The Gospel Coach, I talk of differences between men and women more in Part 2 of this article. A few years ago, my wife Eileen and I co-wrote a book on this subject: "WOMEN: Called to be Fathers of the Gospel."
At this time, let's take a look at how women and men are different in how they think spiritually.
A profound way men and women differ is that we men have a knack in terms of thinking we are conquerors, rulers, and we're always trying to achieve success. This began in Genesis chapter 3. God spoke to Eve and said, "Your desire shall be for your husband, but he shall rule over you." Women don't think the way men do. They have a desire for intimacy, while men have a desire to control. Although I must admit I have met some pretty controlling women.
Men have more of a tendency to think and relate by means of their heads, not their hearts. They related to things in a 'formula' type mind-set: A + B = C. They want to know how to achieve what they want, and their minds given them this ability and satisfaction. They can create 'systems' in their minds that will help them create the steps, or the map, or the formula to get where they want to go.
For this reason, men tend to relate better to the Old Testament system of rules. Here, it tells them what they need to DO in order to GET what they want. Their reasoning is that if they merely keep the rules, then they will be blessed and favored by God. If they don't keep the rules then they won't be blessed. Women relate better to the New Testament concepts of love and grace.
If you want a rule book, then the Old Testament is the place to look. It creates a formula and system approach to life that men relate to. It's a matter of the head being in control, and it can be grasped with the mind. It's a process of reasoning that men relate to. This type of environment makes them thrive.
On the other hand, most women tend to live life more in their hearts than in their heads. They are not 'rule book thinkers,' like we men are. They are not focused on the END as much as they are the MEANS to get to the end. While men are more focused on the result, or on the destination, women are usually more focused on the journey.
Neither men nor women stand in concrete! We can both move and change! I know men who think more like women (I've been accused of this myself). Some women think more like men. As a Christian counselor who has given up on counseling and has now become a gospel life coach, I can testify that this is the way things are. Nothing is absolute. But there are tendencies.
I've already said that women are more HEART driven, while men live in their heads. This means that women are more RELATIONAL in nature, while men are more RATIONAL.
Women like the PROCESS of romance (or if you prefer: relationship) -- whether with God or with their man. They want to know how the two of them work together to achieve a desired end and to bring about a good ways and means. Men are more PROGRAM driven and motivated: "Let's get the job done." Their reasoning tells them if they can work the PROGRAM, then they will get what they want and achieve their goals.
Thus men are more Old Testament focused because it was more of a 'cause and effect' type system. Today, men can see they should not steal because they may go to jail. They should not commit adultery because they may get AIDS, divorced, or murdered. They should not kick the dog or the cat, because they may get bitten or scratched. It's a very 'matter of fact' way of thinking that is very functional and practical.
In Part 2 of this, we will look at why the gospel is easier for women than it is for men. As THE GOSPEL LIFE COACH, I know that dealing with women is often very different from dealing with men.
As The Gospel Coach, I talk of differences between men and women more in Part 2 of this article. A few years ago, my wife Eileen and I co-wrote a book on this subject: "WOMEN: Called to be Fathers of the Gospel."
At this time, let's take a look at how women and men are different in how they think spiritually.
A profound way men and women differ is that we men have a knack in terms of thinking we are conquerors, rulers, and we're always trying to achieve success. This began in Genesis chapter 3. God spoke to Eve and said, "Your desire shall be for your husband, but he shall rule over you." Women don't think the way men do. They have a desire for intimacy, while men have a desire to control. Although I must admit I have met some pretty controlling women.
Men have more of a tendency to think and relate by means of their heads, not their hearts. They related to things in a 'formula' type mind-set: A + B = C. They want to know how to achieve what they want, and their minds given them this ability and satisfaction. They can create 'systems' in their minds that will help them create the steps, or the map, or the formula to get where they want to go.
For this reason, men tend to relate better to the Old Testament system of rules. Here, it tells them what they need to DO in order to GET what they want. Their reasoning is that if they merely keep the rules, then they will be blessed and favored by God. If they don't keep the rules then they won't be blessed. Women relate better to the New Testament concepts of love and grace.
If you want a rule book, then the Old Testament is the place to look. It creates a formula and system approach to life that men relate to. It's a matter of the head being in control, and it can be grasped with the mind. It's a process of reasoning that men relate to. This type of environment makes them thrive.
On the other hand, most women tend to live life more in their hearts than in their heads. They are not 'rule book thinkers,' like we men are. They are not focused on the END as much as they are the MEANS to get to the end. While men are more focused on the result, or on the destination, women are usually more focused on the journey.
Neither men nor women stand in concrete! We can both move and change! I know men who think more like women (I've been accused of this myself). Some women think more like men. As a Christian counselor who has given up on counseling and has now become a gospel life coach, I can testify that this is the way things are. Nothing is absolute. But there are tendencies.
I've already said that women are more HEART driven, while men live in their heads. This means that women are more RELATIONAL in nature, while men are more RATIONAL.
Women like the PROCESS of romance (or if you prefer: relationship) -- whether with God or with their man. They want to know how the two of them work together to achieve a desired end and to bring about a good ways and means. Men are more PROGRAM driven and motivated: "Let's get the job done." Their reasoning tells them if they can work the PROGRAM, then they will get what they want and achieve their goals.
Thus men are more Old Testament focused because it was more of a 'cause and effect' type system. Today, men can see they should not steal because they may go to jail. They should not commit adultery because they may get AIDS, divorced, or murdered. They should not kick the dog or the cat, because they may get bitten or scratched. It's a very 'matter of fact' way of thinking that is very functional and practical.
In Part 2 of this, we will look at why the gospel is easier for women than it is for men. As THE GOSPEL LIFE COACH, I know that dealing with women is often very different from dealing with men.
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This is just the beginning! men and women differences Also visit Roger Himes, The Gospel Coach to get daily Gospel Tweets spirituality and spiritual growth Get the best out of the most you have to offer! The gospel empowers you to do so!
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